so not cool

I am so angry.

I finally had time to write down so many of my thoughts (and there so many), and again they were lost. Just like that. And I had been saving it. This blog is one of the most important things to me on this trip (usually more important than my papers. The posts are way better edited than my papers because i use a computer, and don't have a due date). It is so important to me because not only does it allow me to articulate and process so many things, but it allows me to do so with all of you at home and school. I know I haven't had the ability for much personal interaction from abroad, but I really think of you all so much and think of my blog as my way of maintaining my connection with you. Just little notes telling me that you read it mean so much.

So I guess my message is, don't take your computer for granted.

Quick update: after Delhi, we spent three days in Sewegram in Eastern Maharashtra at one of the ashrams started by Gandhi. We spent a good deal of time on an overview of Ghandian philosophy and ethics. Check out his list of seven sins. Then we stayed on a farm owned by a back-to-the-land couple who were also an NGO working in tribal villages. (Brings up some good questions about "middle-class activism" and the larger role of NGO's, but that doesn't take away from the fact that they were an awesome couple.) We also learned a lot about the global cotton economy, visiting different places along the supply chain. Then I stayed in a smaller group at the natural and organic farm of Vasant and Karuna. It was incredible. I'll need more time to explain. I learned a lot about the essence of ecology, being barefoot, and mud houses (they keep out the radiation!) I left not wanting to eat refined sugar. It didn't last too long. For vacation I went with a friend up to Varanasi (and chilled with Aine!!!) and then up up further north to Kushinagar, the town where the Buddha died. A relaxing christmas, except I got sick at the end of it, for the first time. We spent a week in Gujarat, where the logic and violence of state-facilitated capitalism became blatantly clear to me. It's basically warfare against Dalit and Adivasi villages. Visceral reaction. Intellectual clarity. We spent four days in Mumbai. Downtown feels like a mixture of LA and New York, the most I've felt like I was in the states so far. Of course, we can't forget that the 18 million residents (New Zealand has only 3.5 million) of Mumbai lives in slums. But we'd have to deconstruct what we really mean by the term "slum." Now we're on another farm (of hip trendy young activists from the city) outside of Mumbai to do our final program and process.

I'm good. Exhausted. I was in a tiny bit of a bad mood, and so excited to post all the recent things I wrote. Now that it didn't work, I feel like I lost that opportunity to share my life and thoughts with you. Now I just miss you all more. ugh.

happy new year. much love.